


Like Waves

by bluemoon



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: A little, AU, Angst, Fluff, M/M, Poetry, Spring, Summer, Winter, beach, fall - Freeform, seasons au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-22
Updated: 2013-10-15
Packaged: 2017-12-27 07:11:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/975950
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluemoon/pseuds/bluemoon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He remembers<br/>like it would kill him<br/>to forget,<br/>like it would kill them all,<br/>again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Leaves

**Author's Note:**

> I just got the urge to write this. I'll post the next chapter tomorrow(as in, in a couple hours) if all goes well.

She was  
like the wind  
that nips at his red, sensitive ears,  
cold and thin.  
Eager to take,  
ready to use,  
made to destroy.

Her lustrous brown hair,  
defied the season,  
still curtaining her scarf,  
in thick, overwhelming waves.

He remembers.

Her devastating laugh.  
How it colored the air  
as she kicked the dry,  
coarse leaves that littered,  
the ground.  
Her gloved fingers,  
shaking,  
loose,  
and unstable,  
in his.

He remembers.

Her dark brown orbs,  
burning into the wall beside his orange door,  
searching,  
and clouded,  
as he held her.  
Sweaty and warm.

His own eyes,  
looking to meet hers,  
inevitable,  
tiredly,  
compromising for darkness  
instead.

He remembers.

The sweet, sticky warmth,  
that filled his heart.  
Heavy,  
engulfing his being,  
quelling his suspicious beast  
as she whispered to him,  
loud and harsh,  
that she felt the same.  
Next to the rotting pumpkin  
stashed away in his yard.

He remembers  
like it would kill him  
to forget,  
like it would kill them all,  
again.  
And he lets it tear him apart,  
that some days,  
she is all that fills his mind,  
still.  
That she built the world that he has to live in now.


	2. Frost Bite

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys like it. I might be able to post another chapter in a couple hours depending on how busy I am.

It was dry,  
and grey,  
like tainted snow.  
And the smell was pungent,  
and eternal,  
etched into his skin  
and every part of his brain.

The flames that engulf his dreams,  
and wake him up,  
shivering into the darkness  
that has become so home to him.

His silent screams  
burn his throat  
and choke him.

He lives to remember  
memories like these.  
He is jaded now,  
but they will never be.

No,  
they live in his heart  
and tug at his one vibrant face,  
creating canals in it.  
They torture his soul  
until all that’s left is black smoke  
and ashes,  
once again.

He wears it on his face,  
so that they don’t come close,  
or touch.

But not him.  
He doesn't want to read his face.  
Only his heart,  
what he can find of it.

He is like  
hot chocolate on a snowy Sunday.  
Too hot,  
too much,  
too good,  
but he drinks it all at once,  
against his will,  
and it scratches his tongue and throat,  
leaving a mark there for days.

And it kills him,  
those dark wide eyes,  
and pale skin,  
and long limbs,  
all hope and spirit,  
youth and pain,  
fear and love.

Vibrating.  
Everywhere.  
And it scares him more,  
than the darkness that drowns him,  
each night,  
more than the demons,  
that lay in his bed,  
and in his head.  
More than the Christmas lights,  
charred and mangled,  
that still hang above the back windows   
of the preserve.  
More than her,  
because

more than once,  
he fast words,  
and loud hands  
and intoxicating energy,

make him   
forget it all.  
If only for a second.


	3. Sunshine and Rain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like this chapter a lot so I hope you do too.

The first time  
he kisses him,  
its next to the jeep  
in front  
of the singed house.

The sunshine warms the changing air  
and he sucks all the oxygen out of him,  
hoping  
to somehow get a breath of the life  
something to sustain  
the heart growing inside him.

He holds onto his face,  
warm and flushed,  
confused and startled.  
Then he’s kissing him.  
And he’s running  
his long thin fingers  
all over his bearded face.  
And clutching  
(for life)   
at his dark green shirt,  
like he’s searching for something,  
and finds it on his waist,  
resting his warm palms there.

It feels like everything  
and one thing.  
It feels like feeling  
(something other than pain)  
and that  
feels like being alive. 

It feels like hope  
and fear.

And 8 days later,  
after he’s denied it all  
in his heart  
and built the walls again,  
and his heart has started  
shrinking in the March rain,  
he sees him,

standing by the gas pump,  
anxious as always,  
and it hits him like a train,  
all over again.  
Everything  
and something  
and maybe even nothing.  
(not even the pain he’s used to)  
and he says he’ll try.

He looks back at him,  
eyes wide and confused,  
again,  
and he asks him to  
just  
be  
(there).

And he is.  
He does.

But when a time passes,  
and the sun hasn't reached his dark dreams  
and his misses the taste of the ash  
and it hurts him to forget  
sometimes,  
it floods his soul.   
Too much to feel  
and none of it tangible.  
Except the body lying next to his in the darkness,  
his fingertips burning into his heart,  
whispering nothings.  
But it’s too dark to see,  
and too loud  
(in his mind)  
to hear.

And his dam breaks.  
(He started saying goodbye   
to everyone and everything)  
before he could say hello.


	4. Summer Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I hope my chapter titles made sense and kinda helped you understand what the fic was about. The whole thing was unbetaed. Sorry it took so long to post this chapter. I was super busy.

This time  
he doesn't let himself  
forget  
because  
he can’t.

The warmth  
of a hand,  
the beat   
of a heart,  
the love  
of another.

And he can’t  
forget

the hole  
in his   
heart  
where he dug  
a home  
for his love.

Now   
an empty   
cave.

It doesn't close,  
but rain  
turns to  
sunshine  
and the sea  
all but screams  
his name.

It’s no  
coincidence  
that they share it  
too.  
And he immerses himself in it all.  
Reborn, free,  
and  
wild.   
Maybe for  
the first time.

 

It doesn't feel like  
drowning  
anymore.  
But he can only describe  
it  
as a long held breath  
when he sees him again.  
Hands and   
words and   
all.   
Laughing into the hot air,  
giving it life.

And he doesn't let himself  
forget  
because he can’t.  
Not when he smiles  
at him, so loud   
and bright  
it hurts  
not to do it back.  
Not when he asks  
what took him   
so long.

When they kiss  
this time,  
he doesn't search,  
he doesn't need,  
he knows  
where it is  
and it crashes against him  
like waves.


End file.
